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How I Feel Today

I feel as though I'm coming off a funk I've been in lately. The last week or so I've been up and down, though mostly down. I've had this sore throat and runny nose and gunk for over a week now and though it hasn't really been bad enough to interfere too much in my life its certainly been annoying. Plus there's been a lot to think about, a lot of unexpected changes coming my way and I'm not at all sure how to handle them. Plus the Oscars were pretty depressing. But mostly I found myself regressing into uncertainty and doubt and fear and shame, which were once my constant companions and who I have only begun recently to live without. At times fear clenched my heart and drained me of all my power, like some kind of kryptonite. I felt apathetic and pessimistic. I was overwhelmed by the odds. I wanted to give up on everything.

No more. Today I feel full of energy and drive, like I can do anything. Once again I remember the choices I made long ago not to meddle in “what ifs” or “if onlys,” not to regret things that I had no control over, to take what life has given me and enjoy it to the best of my ability. I've remembered my commitment to being honest with myself, proud of myself, to love myself. I've reclaimed the power to stand tall and speak out, to say what is left unsaid, to challenge and expand minds, and to be the voice for the voiceless.

If this sounds like the mantra a superhero would spout before he took off into the light of the setting sun to fight evil, its because I'm feeling like a superhero today. A Man of Steel! A Boy Wonder! Watch me go higher and higher until, at last, I touch stars....

Comments

Unknown said…
Now all you need is a cool name and a sidekick (I'll volunteer for that position; I'll send you my resume). How about. . .um. . .The Rhetoric Rumbler! Well, that's the best I can do.
Matt Haws said…
YOU as my sidekick?? Well, of course I'll need to see your resume, but I'm prepared to tell you candidly that we'd be an unstoppable duo the likes of which have never been seen! Kind of like Batman & Robin, only without the homosexual undertones! Well, unless our costumes involve spandex, at which point its pretty much out of our hands. Leather's no good either. Flannel? Um.... can we think of something to make a costume out of thats NOT gay?
Anonymous said…
Hmm. say jay stares with funny expression on her face, wondering exactly what to make of these past two comments, and gives matt a look. Then shrugs, sighs and volunteers for the parts of:
a)the super villain
b)the girl "side kick" thing... kind of like cat woman (sticking to the batman theme)
c)the super hot but not super dumb love interest
d)the costume and makeup artist or
e)a combination of some or all of the above. Ooh... combining all of the above actually might be QUITE interesting and she suggests it.
haha.
So, yeah... as for the resume part, I guess she'd be willing to either send one in or post her own on her blog if that is, indeed, a necessary element. Then we'll have a whole train of superheroe posts!
Say Jay would also like to add that the movie premier last night was well attended and actually a good short film.
Lastly she wants to know when the next hang out time is. SJ
eleka nahmen said…
You do realize that your superman is sporting a pink spandex ensemble, yes? ;)
Matt Haws said…
Yes, I am fully aware. I think it take a REAL man to wear pink spandex. It suggests volumes about my testosterone level.

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