No, I'm not dead.
And no, I've not given up on the blog. Not yet. If I were to try to describe how busy I have been over the last few weeks, your head would probably explode - and I can't very well have you messing up my nice clean blog, can I? Just trust me when I say that I've had precious little time to do much of anything in the last little while, and what free time I did have went to important computer gaming in order to save my remaining sanity.
The play has been going quite well. Much better than was generally expected, actually, so I really encourage you to come and see it if you haven't yet. Just thought I'd mention it.
I got a new job this week. Yes, its a big deal. As you are aware if you have read my blog at all before, [understatement coming] I didn't really like my previous job [understatement finished]. So I now have a brand new job closer to home in a more typical office setting.
The problem with having a degree in English (well, one of the problems) is that the kind of work you end up doing is difficult to explain in casual conversation when somebody asks, "Oh, what do you do?" It was especially difficult for this job since I wasn't even sure what I was going to be doing, exactly, until Tuesday. So whenever I got "the question," it would go something like this:
ME: Hey, I got a new job!
THEM: Great! Where?
ME: This place in Orem.
THEM: Really, what's it called?
ME: Amacai?
THEM: Oh.... (blank look) So, what do you do?
ME: Um.... its technical.
THEM: Technical?
ME: You know.... web.. computer.... stuff.....
THEM: Ah.... well, good luck with that.
With the general result that I felt like a complete moron. Now I know exactly what I do at work, but its no easier to explain. I'm doing taxonomy of databases, but that hardly means anything to anybody. That could be an advantage, however. For instance, if somebody asks what I do I can just say, as I did last night, "I'm a taxonomist" which sounds impressive and mysterious enough. What it means is that I spend my time categorizing businesses and services into hierarchies and subcategories for yellow page-like databases. It sounds really boring, I know, but I really like it so far. It's right up my alley. But by using a big word like "taxonomy" I hope to scare people off from asking more questions. I want them just to accept that I have a very important job with a big, strange name and simply be impressed. I can't go answering silly specific questions about what I actually do!
The problem only comes when somebody actually knows what taxonomy is. Typically, it applies to the categorization of animal species, which is something people might genuinely be impressed by. Here's what happened last night:
ME: (smugly) I'm a taxonomist.
THEM: (excited) Wow! So you categorize and classify animal species and specimens?
ME: um.... I categorize!...... stuff....
THEM: (disappointed) Oh.... I see.
That's what I get for being pretentious. And I'm not the only one at work with this problem. I was discussing this with a coworker yesterday, and he said that he just tells people he "maps databases." I think thats fine, but it seems a little lackluster. With just a little word substituition, we can make the job sound much more exciting than that. I suggest a few simple changes: we replace the word "maps" with "shoots" and the word "databases" with "terrorists." Presto! Nobody thinks you are wasting your life anymore!
A little imagination can go a long way....
And no, I've not given up on the blog. Not yet. If I were to try to describe how busy I have been over the last few weeks, your head would probably explode - and I can't very well have you messing up my nice clean blog, can I? Just trust me when I say that I've had precious little time to do much of anything in the last little while, and what free time I did have went to important computer gaming in order to save my remaining sanity.
The play has been going quite well. Much better than was generally expected, actually, so I really encourage you to come and see it if you haven't yet. Just thought I'd mention it.
I got a new job this week. Yes, its a big deal. As you are aware if you have read my blog at all before, [understatement coming] I didn't really like my previous job [understatement finished]. So I now have a brand new job closer to home in a more typical office setting.
The problem with having a degree in English (well, one of the problems) is that the kind of work you end up doing is difficult to explain in casual conversation when somebody asks, "Oh, what do you do?" It was especially difficult for this job since I wasn't even sure what I was going to be doing, exactly, until Tuesday. So whenever I got "the question," it would go something like this:
ME: Hey, I got a new job!
THEM: Great! Where?
ME: This place in Orem.
THEM: Really, what's it called?
ME: Amacai?
THEM: Oh.... (blank look) So, what do you do?
ME: Um.... its technical.
THEM: Technical?
ME: You know.... web.. computer.... stuff.....
THEM: Ah.... well, good luck with that.
With the general result that I felt like a complete moron. Now I know exactly what I do at work, but its no easier to explain. I'm doing taxonomy of databases, but that hardly means anything to anybody. That could be an advantage, however. For instance, if somebody asks what I do I can just say, as I did last night, "I'm a taxonomist" which sounds impressive and mysterious enough. What it means is that I spend my time categorizing businesses and services into hierarchies and subcategories for yellow page-like databases. It sounds really boring, I know, but I really like it so far. It's right up my alley. But by using a big word like "taxonomy" I hope to scare people off from asking more questions. I want them just to accept that I have a very important job with a big, strange name and simply be impressed. I can't go answering silly specific questions about what I actually do!
The problem only comes when somebody actually knows what taxonomy is. Typically, it applies to the categorization of animal species, which is something people might genuinely be impressed by. Here's what happened last night:
ME: (smugly) I'm a taxonomist.
THEM: (excited) Wow! So you categorize and classify animal species and specimens?
ME: um.... I categorize!...... stuff....
THEM: (disappointed) Oh.... I see.
That's what I get for being pretentious. And I'm not the only one at work with this problem. I was discussing this with a coworker yesterday, and he said that he just tells people he "maps databases." I think thats fine, but it seems a little lackluster. With just a little word substituition, we can make the job sound much more exciting than that. I suggest a few simple changes: we replace the word "maps" with "shoots" and the word "databases" with "terrorists." Presto! Nobody thinks you are wasting your life anymore!
A little imagination can go a long way....
Comments
I LOVED IT, I LOVED IT, I LOVED IT!
Wowee! It was SO good, Matt!
Shameless Promotion: everyone who hasn't seen it, go see it! Its the best BYU production I've ever seen, and one of the best plays I've ever seen in general. The acting is phenominal, as are the costumes, set, music and cool technological effects. Wow.
I think I'm comming to see it again. Say Jay