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Last Day at Work

Today is my last day at work – after this, the countdown to my departure begins in earnest. I'll spend most of next week packing, finalizing travel plans, making sure I have a place to live in South Carolina, spending time with friends, freaking out, and playing computer games. Then, the week after that is when it all goes down. A four day cross-country drive followed by weeks and weeks of adjustment to a new life.

This is so different than what I've grown used to over the last year and a half. My life as an out-of-college full-time employee has been anything but busy or unpredictable. Every single day has followed the same schedule, week after week of basically the same thing.

I've worked at this job for nine months. Ironic, isn't it. It's been like my own little gestation period and now I'm ready to be born. I'll squeeze out of this cubicle womb and face the world, covered from head to toe in amniotic fluid.... wait, I guess I'm taking the metaphor a little too far there. The point is, this is my last day at work and the beginning of the first day of the rest of my life. And I'm going to be totally on my own. It's time to cut the umbilical cord.

So I guess I need to eulogize about the end of my career here at this quaint little office. I've become such a lazy worker lately that I was sure my supervisors hated me and couldn't wait to be rid of me. Well, turns out they thought I was moving to Chicago (where the corporate offices are) and wanted to offer me a job there! And they took me out to lunch on Tuesday, and are ordering pizza today in honor of my departure. People like me, gosh dang it, and I just can't seem to figure that one out.

I think I'll look back fondly on my time as a taxonomist, but not so fondly that I'll ever want to return to it. I mean, it was a big word, and fun to say, but it's not really me. I made some good friends here, had some good times, made a bit of cash (which somehow has already been spent) and learned some valuable skills. Still, ultimately its not for me. I don't want the most crucial decisions of my day to be whether “air conditioning” is a “feature” or an “amenity.” I want to grasp life with both hands, wave it above my head wildly, and then smear it all over my chest in masculine frenzy. Really, is that so much to ask?

Comments

Unknown said…
I'm sure that air conditioning is a "luxury." One that you will be thankful to your lucky stars that your car possesses during that four day drive in this heat. Fare thee well.

I'm seeing your show tommorrow.
Anonymous said…
Sometimes all we can do is smear life across our chests. It was nice to see you perform one last time before you live the east coast life. I'm envious. I miss it there.

Good luck to you. I already know you're going to be fabulous. :)

Em
voyageuse said…
Matt I finally watched Six Black Lines last night. You did Such a nice job! I was really impressed.
topher clark said…
What's six black lines? I want to see it.
Anonymous said…
Air Conditioning belongs under Features as well as any other random word you might think of. This of course should be a dead giveaway on who this anonymous poster is. Have a safe trip and good luck at SC. Cheers.

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